Pirate Speed Dating

I have been trying to take a really awesome photo on Second Life for Valentines Day this year. Everyone is getting into the whole “Awww I wuv you!” posts followed by couples in cute little embraces wearing, in most cases, nothing.

You are not seeing my booty this Valentines Day. Unless I get desperate. No…probably not then either.

I would love to take a picture with “St.” Bishop but I can’t. Second Life hates his computer so he doesn’t hang out anymore. This makes a gal cry cry & shit because I don’t have anyone to take this damn lovey heart filled picture of sweetness with. Or hangout with. Or actually check out my house. Or wash my socks. Wait. I wash my own socks.

Why The Hell Are There Floating Calky Love Candies?

Since “St.” Bishop can’t be my Valentine picture partner I decided to scour the prim lands to find someone to take one with me.

As long as they didn’t ask me “Hey baby wanna go fuck after this?” (Tipsy don’t sugar coat the language baby.) I would be good.

Maybe I should just take a picture with a tree. Its safer. Unless it’s one of THOSE trees. (Gives prim trees “THE EYE”.)

I ended up shipwrecked in my search at a little place called “Valentine Beach“. This is where I ended up running into a pirate named “Herb”. Granted Herb was actually a prim pirate did not deter me from attempting to take a photo with him for my Valentines Day picture.

This did not work out very well.

First I asked him nicely to share his bottle of pirate rotgut. Herb answered me with an “Arrr” then proceeded to keep chugging the bottle. Amazed at the fact the bottle seemed to be completely bottomless I once again asked him to let me have some. His only answer was “Arrrr” followed by another round of chugging.

Why Oh Why Won't You Share Your Rotgut Herb?

Since Herb the pirate was not up for sharing his rotgut with me I pulled out my own. After a few swigs from my alcohol stash (I am betting you are trying to figure out where I keep my booze in this dress. It’s a secret) I asked him politely if I could get a photo with him for Valentines day. As he stared ahead & kept chugging I politely explained to him that I needed a pretty picture that I could use on my site on Feb. 14th. His blank stares followed by a lot of “Arrs” & chugging was starting to wear thin on my fragile alcoholic nerves. I needed to find a bar & find one fast.

I shall never find a good picture buddy. Woe is me!!

Since Herb only knew one word, & I bet you can guess what it is, I wandered over to a lovely looking monk who just happened to be standing next to a bunch of kegs. There was a beer spilled in his little work area that both excited me & saddened me. Spilled beer might mean he’s drunk already. It might also mean he’s abuses alcohol by calling it “Bad” & then tipping it over while laughing menacingly.

“Muah ha ha ha! Take that bitch beer!”

I was wrong. Murry the monk, as I have named him, doesn’t really move. Doesn’t really do much of anything. What a load of crap.

Awkward.

This attempt to take a picture for Feb. 14th was a complete bust. I am still without a picture buddy. Herb the pirate wouldn’t share his rotgut. The monk was boring as all hell.

I will get this Valentines Picture thing for a Feb. 14th release.

I will do this!

“Tipsy” Cerulean

About Stuff:

Dress By:

*COCO Designs*PartyDress_Black

Photos Taken At:

Valentine Beach (Not really all that exciting. Hell…there are red stripper poles right on the beach.)

Photo Of “St.” Bishop:

Used Picnik to only crop & add candy hearts. No altering was used He used my computer to sign in & take the picture. Still pissed off that we haven’t come up with a viewer that runs lighter for older computers. I’ll leave that bitch for another day.

Other Photos:

I just cropped & used various windlight settings. I forgot to write which ones down as I was drinking at the time. Have fun with windlight to set up your own moods.

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