When I was a wee lass my parents would take us to the mall every spring to sit on the Easter Bunnies lap. I have dozens of photos from the time I was a baby of me sitting on this bunnies lap. Sometimes I looked really pissed off while other times I gave one of those “I have no clue why the fuck I have to do this” looks.
As an adult I am sorta mystified by the whole bunny sitting experience. The Easter Bunny is not Santa Claus so it’s not like I could ask him for an easy bake oven or a “My First Gimp” play set. You can clearly tell that you are not sitting on a real bunny.
If you sit on a real bunny you will squish it. Friends don’t let friends squish bunnies.
It’s a weird smelling person, presumably that they found behind the mall dumpster, in a badly made bunny suit. The whole idea of sitting on this smelly suited strangers lap is…well…kinda dumb.
Everyone knows that the Easter Bunny will just crap out chocolate eggs, put them in a basket, & bring them to you on Easter even if you don’t sit on his lap.
Anywho…with that weird plot by adults to take strange photos of their children aside…I decided to go on a quest to find an Easter Bunny I could sit on in Second Life. You would think this would be some sort of easy task but OHHHH NOOOOO you have to weed out the shopping malls & breedable animals from the list. It’s not easy trying to find a damn bunny to sit on that reminds you of a real life traumatizing Easter Bunny experience.
Here are three attempts at finding the elusive bunny:
Rachelville is an area where they try to recreate children’s literature. This seemed extremely promising as I was at least expecting to be able to sit on Peter Rabbits lap & ask him for the directions to the Easter Bunny. Alas there was no Peter Rabbit I could sit on nor could I get any directions out of any rabbits I saw around the land. However I did get a photo with a photo of an Easter Bunny.
I do want to point out that the idea of recreating literature is great & they have made a decent attempt. I do suggest reading the notecard as to why the place was created. It is a heartfelt story.
On With Easter The Bunny Search!!!!
There are only three words that can sum up searching for an Easter Bunny in a sex area.
In the search for this place “Easter Bunny” is listed as a keyword. I spent a few minutes wandering around trying to find the Easter Bunny kinda hoping I wouldn’t run into him. Do you really want to find the Easter Bunny in some sort of compromising situation?
Examples: Having sex in a butcher shop, funeral parlor, or laundry mat?
I ended my search abruptly as I was being followed by some shirtless guy with a mohawk. Not to mention the numerous people taking advantage of the sex balls.
OH WHERE ARE YOU EASTER BUNNY??!!?!?!??
Easter Town sounds promising but it’s basically just a mall. A bunch of shops selling Easter related items. I’m not looking for a mall god damn it. I’m looking for the damn Easter Bunny.
Tipsy is currently getting a beer & learning to breathe again. She will be back in a moment. Till then enjoy this hold music.
Dooo Dooo Dooo Dooo Wooop A Dooo Dooo Dooo
So we just have shopping & a bunch of Easter Bunny looking items. Nothing that screams childhood bunny trauma a’la mall photo style.
I am not going to stop searching for that mall style Easter Bunny that I can sit on to take a picture. We will find that bunny.