Dear Naked Virtual Guy

 

Dear Naked Guy Just Standing There,

The packages  you were holding were a nice touch. I’m sad that I was unable to capture that moment in time. At least I got to snap a photo of you in all of your naked backside glory.

nakedshopper

So…how’s stuff? Hope everything virtual is going well for you. I would suggest putting on a sweater or at least a scarf so you don’t catch a cold. Winter’s a bitch that will smack your naked cartoon ass around if you’re not careful.

I just wanted to ask you a few questions. Why exactly are you naked? Did you lose a bet? Did you lose your clothing? I’m thinking that you’re one of those avatars who doesn’t give a crap about sim maturity ratings. I would say that you’re a free spirit who lets his boner flap in the wind but I could tell that was not the case. Kinda hard being a male avatar when you forget to attach your crayon in its proper place. From now on I shall just call you Ken.

Dear Ken. May I impart a few little nuggets of wisdom upon you. When you want to go out into our virtual playground remember to put your pants on. Please also remember to put on a shirt because male avatars that walk around with no shirt on are not cool. They just look like douches. If you were there to find clothes to put on because you were naked then I hope you find the outfit you were looking for. I would go into a whole speech about how I understand if you are having a hard time figuring out the user interface but you’re over two years old. So…for fucks sake. Put some clothes on.

Yours Truly, 

“Tipsy” Cerulean

 

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