Tag Archives: virtual world

Hell Is A Virtual Word

I’m going to start this with a song stuck in my head while I wrote this. It’s fitting.

I like to browse the Second Life fashion feeds just for the hell of it. Most of the time it’s out of boredom or just to see whats up with whatever someone deems worthy to wear. A lot of it is pure shit. I’m assuming that many fashion bloggers couldn’t give a bad review on an article of clothing if it tried to car jack them, stole their purse, threw their puppy, and called them names.

But I’m not getting into that today. Instead I’m welcoming you into my evil little hell world where I’m just going to bitch about female portrayal in many Second Life fashion photos.

Hell Is Hot And Shit....

Hell Is Hot…And Shit…

We have to stop for a moment and ponder the state of Second Life or many virtual worlds that are out there. These worlds are inhabited by real people with real lives and feelings.

Blah blah blah.

You’ve heard this all before. Be nice to each other and whateves.

Don’t be a dick you fucking dick.

I just feel that a lot of the ways a woman is portrayed in Second Life fashion blogs is absolute bullshit. I’ve seen more photos this week of women on their knees, wearing slut-tasitc outfits, or just flat out letting it all hang out in a not-so-artsy way. I would assume that everyone is on some sort of “OMG A MOVIE BASED ON A FANFICTION THAT INACCURATELY PORTRAYS A HEALTHY BDSM RELATIONSHIP CAME OUT!” kick with the photography lately but I would be way off. It’s been here before and it’s been here after. It’s not going anywhere.

I am not knocking the kink (I love the kink. I am a step above kink. Trust me. I blow your little universe away. Go kink!), My issue is that the constant bombardment of whorish fashion photos just knocks women in a virtual world back a few pegs. Most of us have been through internet harassment, abuse, or constant “Will you have sex with me?” . You’re not helping. You are really not helping to get people who are not asshole jack off creeps to explore the nerdy (Yes….it’s nerdy….don’t you argue with me…) realm of virtual worlds. When you constantly give hardy reviews to horrific fashion that might cover one nipple, let your ass crack hang out, and involves cum stains does not really help anything but once again stick that post it note of “we’re only here for you guys” bullshit.

I would like to see something a little different this year. I want you to look an outfit you are going to review and honestly tell us if it sucks or not. I want to see someone say “Fuck you!” and post a female positive picture that doesn’t make you some sort of hooker blow job advertisement to get guys to eat you out for money. (That has got to be a hard ass road of virtual porn there my friends. Yes…Made myself laugh with that one.)

Instead of forcing everyone to look the same, become big assed (Even though your big asses are my blog bread and butter….you dumbasses with the insanely fat asses pay the bills yo),  bottom titty, submissive little twits why don’t we get a little female positive up in here. Screw looking sexy. It’s all about you baby.

Keep It Classy.

“Tipsy” Cerulean

P.S. – By the picture you might think that i do not go biggie on Second Life. That is absolute crap. I do all the time to go to places to write about, etc, etc. What the fuck ever etc. I do not bother anymore to go biggie most of the time via sl anymore because to the fashion ideal of how I should look as well as how I am treated. I would rather be told I am “adorable” rather than get asked for sex everywhere I go. When I put my “biggie” on I get Skype invites, sex invites, etc. I’m a social virtual worlds hermit so leave me along unless you have something interesting to say.

I would also like to point out that I am probably one of the biggest sexual positive, kinky, “let’s do this” real life people on the planet.  Pro polyamourous/polyamory. Thumbs up on positive bdsm relationships. Sexual education for the win. I totally dig porn. I just despise being talked to like a piece of meat and treated like a piece of shit in a virtual world. Treat me like a person not your virtual eye candy, shake my titties, piece of virtual waste of space. If I want to fuck you I will. If not then go fuck yourself. That is life in a nutshell folks.

I Wanna Know What Love Is…..

….And this is definitely not showing me what love is. Unless you love going out in public in your underwear with invisible nipples. (Trust me. We’ll discuss nipples in a few minutes.)

Where the hell have you been Tipsy? 

What? Can’t even say hi? Ask me how I’m doing? Maybe even offer me a drink or a comfy place to sit? I see how it is.

I’ve actually been busy as hell in real life. That’s the place you go to when you’re not in Second Life for those that aren’t sure what this real life thing is. I haven’t forgotten about you I’ve just been busy. And completely uninspired by a virtual world. But…I’m back…and I have a lot to say.

To make it up to you I thought we would discuss this hot little number I saw while shopping at one of those “Big Box Events” that everyone seems to attend to get a good deal on some virtual shit or another. You have to love these types of places as it is the place to be for the strange and the half-naked sightings.

Today I would like to introduce Ms. Titty Titty Bang Bang. I just wanted to say “Titty Titty Bang Bang” so not only did I name her this but I also got to type it twice. Score!

TTBB1

Ms. TTBB (For short) came in suddenly in search of, I kid you not, clothing. I am assuming that she really needed the clothing as it is winter in most of the world. One cannot go out with your bits just flapping in the wind and not expect to catch a cold. Or at least have your nipples fall off. Yes…I am assuming this is why she has no nipples.

TTBB2

Blame it on her not rezzing all the way. Blame it on forgetting to place your nipples on your body. (HAHAHA! Nipple placement) or just blame it on them falling off do to nippy frostbite. I feel like I should start doing public service commercials with really sad music explaining the dangers of nipple loss. Maybe start a support group of nipple loss survivors. Make posters and hang them up around town.

Please Care About Those That Don’t Have Nipples Do To Nipple Neglect Won’t You?

Of course, if you know me well enough, you know I cannot forget one badonky of the most badonka donk ass shots that I can come up with. You know I love the virtual booty sightings more than anything in this lil virtual world. It’s like the bread and butter of SLA Review writing. Horrifying are some (many..most…whatevs.) and then you have some that are not so bad. Doesn’t matter. Still need a good booty shot.

TTBB3

It’s good to be back!

“Tipsy” Cerulean

Definition Of SLupidity (Word Made Up By “Tipsy”) – When something is so insanely dumb in Second Life you cannot help but bash your head into your desk until it goes away.

Example: “Wow! That lady with no nipples looks pretty SLupid.”

Summers End

Summer has official come to a close in my little real life world. Summertime is a time that I stop just about all writing about Second Life because it’s too damn nice to be cooped up in a house. There are trails to be hiked. Places to be visited. Sun to stare at.

Well…not stared at exactly…you know what I mean.

I’m trying to get back into the swing of writing virtual things again but this takes me a few. I need to try to get ahead a little bit in the writing so I’m not constantly going “Holy Shit! I should put something out!”.

Back To Work!

Back To Work!

Same goes for the Raglan Report Podcast that I am a part of. I need to update that site and actually record a podcast.

The end of Summer is hard.

So…I’m plotting my plots and whateves to start back into another fun-filled explosion of writing proportions.

Let The Good Times Roll!

“Tipsy” Cerulean

Sim Location: Prim River National Forest  (Which will probably be reviewed soon! Woo!)

Mesh Service

I think I ended up re-writing today’s “March Mesh Madness” article name at least seven times. Almost went with “The Adventures Of Invisi-boobs” but it was too long. I do now plan on using it for the name of my first feature film.

If I ever make one. 

Before we can discuss today’s foray into the wild world of rezzing mesh I must first share with you the photo with which we shall stare at and discuss.

meshwoe

You have to love rezzing mesh! It cuts out the middle man of comedy and brings it straight to your eyeballs. I have absolutely no clue what I that means exactly but we’ll go with it anyways. This meshy mess of rezzing has brought us a lack of hair, shoes, and (if you haven’t noticed the GIANT BLANK SPOT!!) boobs. It’s almost like an invisible cloak titty top.

Yeah baby…I’m wearing my invisible titty top. You like what you can’t see?!!?!

I was at a very high traffic area where there was mesh not rezzing everywhere so I was never able to see exactly what was supposed to be in the boob/top area. I like to imagine that it was something really epic like a halter top with a nipple hanging out or something made of fine virtual leather. This is why I love virtual worlds. Everything tells a story. Even the things that don’t appear.

Go forth into the virtual world that is Second Life. Explore. Stare at mesh that hasn’t appeared yet. Have fun with life. Eat a cookie. Stop drop and roll.

“Tipsy” Cerulean

March Mesh Madness

The month of March starts tomorrow and I was trying to think of a great theme to go with the month. After much thought (and sifting through various photos I’ve taken) I’ve officially declared March to be “March Mesh Madness”!!!

marchmeshmadness

I’m not talking about dedicating a month to mesh fashion or even shopping for mesh. I’m talking about those moments when you rezz into a place filled with individuals wearing nothing but mesh. Before everything comes in clearly you see people who are nothing but hair, or an arm. Those funny moments where you can’t help but giggle as their expensive outfits (and we can’t forget those damn mesh boobs/feet/hands) are not appearing as of yet. I dedicate this month to you Mesh Warrior.

OK. Actually I just wanted to giggle at stupid pictures.

As I run into great opportunities of non-rezzed half mesh individuals I shall share my pictures. May we go through March not wiser but at least laughing.

“Tipsy” Cerulean

Happy..Hallo…Weeen!!

A very freakishly awesome super scary may nothing horrifying take you out in your sleep…

Happy Halloween!

happyhalloween2013

Thank you to all of you that keep reading. Keep sending me messages. And keep making me do this shit when sometimes I feel it’s not worth my time. Halloween is the best time of the year & I was very happy to be able to share all of the many places you could celebrate it in Second Life.  Now here’s to surviving the soul sucking bleak winter alive!

Happy Halloween! 

“Tipsy” Cerulean

Mr. C. Cow does double duty with two jobs. You can also always find him at the Tinies On Tape. 

Darkwoods Scare

Last week I took down horror lane & remembered the Grim Babies & Orphanage. Today we’re going to take a look at a haunted house/orphanage that is ready for your need to find Halloween places in Second Life.

Darkwoods Orphanage (M) doesn’t exactly scream orphanage in my mind. Yes, it does have small beds in the bedrooms & old dirty toys strewn about but there really isn’t too much that screams “I am a really horrible orphanage”. It makes me think more of a family’s home that has gone, literally I guess, straight to hell. When I think of freakishly scary orphanage I think of the ghosts of the past, wicked caretakers, & gruel.

A sort of desperate blood soaked Oliver Twist.

The feel I get from the Darkwoods Orphanage borders more on the family who bought the wrong house & met their doom. MInus the lack of orphanage feel I get out of this place it isn’t half bad. It feels predictable with some of the same items you’ve seen in other haunted houses both this year & years gone (Killer Clowns, Mad Scientists In The Basement.) Pushing past that it does make a great place for creative Halloween photo taking.

Someone Needs To Clean The Bathroom.

Someone Needs To Clean The Bathroom.

As for the house build itself it’s one of the most popular homes I’ve seen used for haunted houses. I saw it numerous times last year & know that this won’t be the last time I see this build again this year. I don’t fault the use of this build because it is a spooky layout & well made. I would, however, like to see people start branching out & trying something new.

I Know This Place...

I Know This Place…

There are a few positives here. The place is well planned out with the furniture & decor. Like I said before you could visit this haunted house to take some creative photos. Nothing screams Halloween better than a good background. Darkwoods Orphanage  is worth a visit if you’re looking for a place to spend a small amount of time wandering around.

“Tipsy” Cerulean

Halloween Trail 2013

It’s that time of year again where we search out horror, zombies, pumpkins, & other Halloween spooktastic items. If you think about it, for most people, it’s not something we look for any other time of the year. 

Freaks! Freaks I tell ya! Freaks!

To start out our month of SL Halloween places & things we need to go back to a place I’ve done written about for the past couple of years. In their 7th year, Aero Pines Park is ready to scare  & amaze with their Halloween Trail 2013. Offering 5 connecting regions with over 20 interactive Halloween displays you’re bound to find something to wet your horror Halloween appetite. If you’re looking for various holiday events then they don’t disappoint with a calendar of Halloween related parties throughout the entire month of October. 

Tiny Bulldogs Are NOT Yummy!

Tiny Bulldogs Are NOT Yummy!

To be an honest review I would like to state that I would like to see their Halloween Trail change a bit more from its previous years. We’ve seen the chop shop. We’ve seen the man-eating plants. We’ve seen it before year after year. It feels old & outdated. Although I highly recommend checking them out I feel that things are getting stale into their 7th year. I know that it takes a LOT of time to put together such a large event but sometimes things need to change. Take the time to switch it up next year. Make it fresh & new. You won’t be sorry if you do. 

Get YOUR HEAD In The Game!

Get YOUR HEAD In The Game!

Go. Check them out, Have a bit of fun wandering around. It is, although stale feeling at times for those who have been there each year, is still worth a visit & a bit of your time. 

Aero Pines Park – Halloween Trail 2013 will be going on from October 1st to 31st. Be sure to find a sign that gives you a bit of information on the trail as well as a map (Which…as of this writing…was an old map from 2011)

“Tipsy” Cerulean

Weekend Crazy Funtime

I feel that “Weekend Crazy Funtime” sounds so much better than saying “I found some cool shit to do in Second Life this weekend!”

I care.

Here are a few of my super top picks of things you must check out this weekend as well as a heads up for one of the greatest things you can  possibly visit next month.

The 2013 Kawaii Fair is currently going on until April 26th. Kawaii means loveable/cute so expect to see a lot of cute items. You can check out their official blog for more information.

The Raglan Shire still has Super Hero’s/Villains month going on as well as it being the Shire’s 6th Birthday. Be sure to visit in your hero or villain costume before the end of the month. For more information please check out their official website as well as the events calendar for events going on throughout the month.

Fear My Giant Olive!

Fear My Giant Olive!

If you plan on doing the Shires Hero/Villain month then I do suggest you come up with an original character & join the fun. My super persona, the inebriator, is a “neutral spirit” hero. I’m neither good nor evil. If it’s a Friday night you love me. But if it’s a Saturday morning you might hate me. So I’m good & evil. All depends on how you view me.

I am…THE INEBRIATOR! MUAH HA HA HA!

If you are looking for a place to take beautiful pictures or just hang in nature check out Winter Moon (M). Beautiful & dark with rain that seems to randomly move around to different spots around the sim. HIGHLY suggest you go check it out.

Here I Sit.

Here I Sit.

Also…The Raglan Shire has their art month coming up in May. It will run from May 5th – 26th. This is a HUGE installation of art from Second Life residents & one of the biggest events. For registration information as well as information about this amazing month of art please check out the Shire’s Art Website.

Have A Wonderful Virtual Weekend Everyone!

“Tipsy” Cerulean

The first photo was just cropped & the words were added to the photo. The black & white photo was edited using Pixlr to show artsy fartsy-ness.

Dear Naked Virtual Guy

 

Dear Naked Guy Just Standing There,

The packages  you were holding were a nice touch. I’m sad that I was unable to capture that moment in time. At least I got to snap a photo of you in all of your naked backside glory.

nakedshopper

So…how’s stuff? Hope everything virtual is going well for you. I would suggest putting on a sweater or at least a scarf so you don’t catch a cold. Winter’s a bitch that will smack your naked cartoon ass around if you’re not careful.

I just wanted to ask you a few questions. Why exactly are you naked? Did you lose a bet? Did you lose your clothing? I’m thinking that you’re one of those avatars who doesn’t give a crap about sim maturity ratings. I would say that you’re a free spirit who lets his boner flap in the wind but I could tell that was not the case. Kinda hard being a male avatar when you forget to attach your crayon in its proper place. From now on I shall just call you Ken.

Dear Ken. May I impart a few little nuggets of wisdom upon you. When you want to go out into our virtual playground remember to put your pants on. Please also remember to put on a shirt because male avatars that walk around with no shirt on are not cool. They just look like douches. If you were there to find clothes to put on because you were naked then I hope you find the outfit you were looking for. I would go into a whole speech about how I understand if you are having a hard time figuring out the user interface but you’re over two years old. So…for fucks sake. Put some clothes on.

Yours Truly, 

“Tipsy” Cerulean